Relaxing is something I have always been TERRIBLE at doing. I tend to be someone that suffers from “hurry syndrome”. There’s so much to do and my brain is always racing with thoughts about all the things I have to do in a day like: my to do list at work, getting home and prepping meals and snacks, exercising, cleaning, thinking about what I have to do at work the next day, etc. It always feels like I am rushed and never have time to just sit down and do nothing until I go to bed.
This weekend was a bit different. My husband and I and some friends took off to a cabin on a lake for the memorial day weekend. It was nice break from the roller coaster of stress I have been through with my diabetes for the past couple of months. We did some brewery tours during the day (I don’t drink though so I was just there to accompany), and then we went to the cabin where we did some grilling and played board games. Late into the evening we went over to the pier, put our feet in the lake, and just talked for a couple of hours while the stars were starting to come out and the sounds of the frogs, crickets, and other animals surrounded us. It was wonderful. It had been a long time since I had been able to relax that much and I think it was a much needed break from diabetes and the busy daily routine. I had the best sleep I have had in a long time. Yeah, my blood sugars were probably running high because I ate a pile of grilled meat instead of measuring my portions like I usually do, but it was delicious so I don’t regret it…ha! The next day on our way back home we went to a petting zoo and did some tourism in the area.
This getaway made me realize that I really need to make an effort to take more time to myself and relax because I feel my entire day is always devoted to diabetes (cooking, stressing about eating, prepping snacks and meals for the next day, checking blood sugars, insulin, wondering if I’m high or low, exercising, worrying about crashing into a low while exercising or while sleeping, appointments, etc). Instead of diabetes just being one part of me it’s become who I am and what I do, and that’s just not healthy. Diabetes should just be one part of my life and not what I think about 100% of the day. I really have to change the mentality I have right now for the sake of my well-being and happiness. This is something that is hard to do though given that I am forced to think about diabetes every time I eat. I’m hoping I’ll get better at learning to relax and not letting diabetes rule my day with time and experience.